Anxiety might just be my worst nightmare. The thing that follows me around wherever I go. I get a handle on my anxiety and I move across the world and it comes at me with a vengeance. I mean if you think about it, it really shouldn't be such a surprise. I am experiencing culture shock on a daily basis, navigating through a new job, and traveling on public transportation in a country I barely know. When I was in Uganda before I was only ever in my village and Kampala and I rarely used public transport. So yeah my anxiety hitting hard doesn't surprise me on the slightest. Thankfully Peace Corps Uganda has a great mental health program so we are working to get my anxiety under control. Honestly it was very difficult for me to make the decision to go see a therapist here in Uganda. I felt strange only having been here for about five months and already needed to see a therapist. Then I thought about it and was like I need to get a handle on it now before it becomes much worse and even more crippling. So last week I started seeing a wonderful therapist here and we are getting a handle on this business. For me sharing my anxiety with others isn't always easy. I'm always worried about what people will say. If you yourself don't have anxiety it's often hard to understand people who do. I don't blame anyone for not being able to understand because I struggle understanding my anxiety as well. But because people don't often understand I struggle talking to people about it. I don't like the questions or the comments I get. Like don't tell someone who is having a panic attack to relax like they are trying to relax I promise you that. Also don't tell someone to just not think about it and it will go away, trust me if we could stop thinking about it we would. So one of the questions I've been getting is if you're having anxiety that means your not happy in Uganda right? Actually know it doesn't mean that. I am extremely happy here in Uganda. I absolutely love living here. Is it difficult at times? Yes, of course it is, but life often is difficult. Plus I had anxiety in the states and I was extremely happy there. Basically having anxiety doesn't make you unhappy somewhere it just makes you worry more. Anxiety abroad can be different because you are dealing with new situations but it's still anxiety.
